It was my first attempt at English101, and my Professor assigned what would be my first collegiate writing assignment, a Descriptive Narrative Essay. The expectation of this assignment was to be highly descriptive using a story of our own: to tell a story in great detail to really grasp your reader. I chose to write about my mental health journey, which I believed had plenty of potential for illustrative elements, given that it was so intense for me. I struggled with the assignment because the topic was so emotional for me. I wasn’t sure how I would get it done without slipping back into the character I was writing about. However, I worked hard on it and I gained a new outlook on my mental health journey, an appreciation for personal writing, and I received a good grade despite my doubts.
Part of the assignment was to title the story something eye-catching that would reel an audience in. This was something I had never done before, but I liked the idea of being able to draw in an audience by the “cover” if you will. I named my story “Swollen Eyes'' - after my body's reaction to crying so long that I was actually dehydrated. I liked how personal the story became, how it included all the nitty gritty details of dealing with depression. This made me realize how effective writing can be, whether it be a personal outlet for therapeutic purposes or to tell a story that others can relate to, both of which I had done by writing that Descriptive Narrative Essay.
I've never felt particularly confident in my writing skills, and this assignment was no different. I had trouble making the essay sound smooth and flow just right because I realized a lot of my mental health journey was a blur. It was hard to recall exactly how things unfolded or other small details that I needed given that this essay called for the specific descriptive details. I scheduled a meeting with an academic counselor to help me edit my essay. I admit, I was hesitant to show her what I was writing at first, because mental health has always been sort-of taboo...but I knew I really needed the help. After reading it once-over, she told me that it takes a lot of courage to tell a story like mine and she was glad I was shedding light onto mental health as a whole. This made me feel bold and empowered, and like my story mattered. I had passion for what I was writing about, and this facillitated receiving a good grade. I liked how I described the cold, white brick walls in the mental hospital I went to, and how my eyes itched and burned from the tears I kept weeping. I wanted to tell a story that illustrated all of the gritty details that everyone seems too uncomfortable to talk about or listen to. I wanted to tell my story. Although sharing these uncomfortable details I knew might be challenging, I knew it was the best way to get through to my audience.
Before I wrote this essay, I believed all essays were done best robotically. You write to do it, and get the grade. I didn't think that I would ever enjoy writing because of my skewed perspective that writing academically should always be rated E for everyone. How could I possibly think my writing was decent when I put no emotion into it? Realistically, I don't expect anyone to read this and think they have to write about something horrible and profoundly heartbreaking that happened to them in order for their writing to be good. However, I do believe humor, irony, rhetorical questions, or other practical and unique elements also have the same potential to connect with an audience in your own individual way. I think “Swollen Eyes” was successful in guiding me to see the benefit of individuality in my writing. Now, I recognize the mediocrity in allowing my writing to fall into the “satisfactory” category, providing nothing unique or interesting. I don't want to shadow someone else's work in any way. My intention is for my audience to actually enjoy reading my work. I don't think anyone enjoys reading or writing unless it has some sort of impactful purpose or human quality to it, as I have hopefully demonstrated.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Call 1-800-273-TALK (8255); En Español 1-888-628-9454 The Lifeline is a free, confidential crisis hotline that is available to everyone 24 hours a day, seven days a week. The Lifeline connects callers to the nearest crisis center in the Lifeline national network. These centers provide crisis counseling and mental health referrals. People who are deaf, hard of hearing, or have hearing loss can contact the Lifeline via TTY at 1-800-799-4889.
Crisis Text Line Text “HELLO” to 741741 The Crisis Text hotline is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week throughout the U.S. The Crisis Text Line serves anyone, in any type of crisis, connecting them with a crisis counselor who can provide support and information.
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